“Keep high aspirations, moderate expectations, and small needs.” –William Howard Stein
“In 1957, Dr. Robert Merton introduced an idea known as the Galatea Effect, which suggests we tend to do what we expect we will do.
If you think you can run a marathon, you are more likely to push yourself through training and eventually cross the finish line. If you expect that you will make friends easily, you will likely be relaxed enough to make people around you feel at ease.
It also works the other way around. If you believe you do not have the leadership skills to run a meeting, your insecurity will undermine your authority. If you expect you will clam up around the person you are attracted to, you will find yourself sweating whenever you meet eyes.
What if we woke up and expected not only the best of ourselves, but also the best in the unexpected? What if we expected that the things we cannot predict will, somehow, turn out for the best? What if we did not just believe in ourselves; we believed in our ability to adapt to the unknown?
We can never know exactly what is coming, but we can know that no matter what happens, we can turn it into something good. We can know that no matter where our aspirations lead us, we can meet all our needs through our interpretations, attitude, and actions.
If you are a little stressed or overwhelmed by where you are headed, remember: you can decide today that no matter what tomorrow brings, you will find some joy in it.” from http://www.tinybuddha.com
It is December and the end of this year (2010) is near. For me it is time to stop winning, to try to imagine what closure looks like and actually do something about. This past 14 months have been a journey inside myself to discover that I do not need someone else to give me closure, that I can find closure within me. No one holds the answers to my questions, but me. This is the turning tide. This is the time I am getting a hold of my life and releasing any unwanted feelings. There is nothing to control, nothing to be sorry or proud of. This is my chance to start anew, to surrender, to reinvent myself and, as the dawn of the year approaches, so does the old me is getting ready to let it go.
A new and wonderful life awaits for me at the 12th ring of the clock, it is midnight and it is time to celebrate the new life that starts today. There are no expectations that it will be easy, that I will not fall back again, that sadness will not knock me down once again, that my heart will not be broken again but, the time spent staring at the eyes in the mirror, have given me the courage to work towards becoming a better person, a better being, a better friend, partner, parent, and no one, not even myself, will stop that from happening.
I am working on becoming the person I once was only much more improved. Watch me.
Have a Happy and blessed New Year.
N. Cardoso Dec 31st, 2010.
Isn’t time a wonderful thing? As I read this post written 3 years ago, it feels like it everything that happened, it happened to someone else…
Here we are, now it is December 31st 2013, and it amazes me to see that all have worked out in harmony and for the best. Here I am, a new person. I am very proud of my heart. It has been bent out of shape, stabbed, betrayed, stepped and stumped on, broken more times than I care to count but, in the end, still works pretty well and it has yet much love to give.
My mind and soul are in complete balance and harmony. The eyes that look back at me in the mirror are not those of a stranger anymore. I recognize, love and forgave myself and all the people involved in the pain that brought me, face down to the bottom of the whole. The person that looks me back at me in the mirror is like a phoenix that has been born again from its own ashes.
I have learned, granted with certain reluctance, to walk away from people and situations that are not ideal for me, or that don’t match with the goals I have for myself or my life.
The journey is far from the end, but it is now a journey I want to be traveling. It is my journey not someone elses’, and that alone is a great victory to me. I am not sure where it will end but I am learning to trust the process…I have little goals, I can’t yet see the whole road ahead, and in all honest I am not sure I want o know all the curves, scenarios and obstacles ahead. I am comfortable seeing just enough to take the next step. I trust that every step of this journey is a step towards to what I have dreamed of. It is a series of steps I feel safe taking. I enjoy the scene from whenever I stand on this path and nothing, nor anyone, can steal this bliss from me. Even tough I walk this path I’ve chosen by myself, I am never alone.
Never let pain fool you into thinking it was a bad thing. Pain has hidden within itself amazing lessons for those who have the courage to go through it. Once you learn from it, you become stronger, fear looses its grip. All it takes to start again is just another step. Your history, your life, you are never a failure. You just learn that those old ways didn’t work and look for news ways of reaching the things that are truly important to us. When that happens, life has this amazing way to show itself wide open in front of you, and then anything, I truly mean anything, can happen!
Most of the greatest blessings in life comes through pain. A caterpillar would never became a butterfly if it refused to grow and find its way out of the cocoon and fly the magnificent butterfly. A seed needs to be buried, stay in the dark, put up with the cold of the winter and the rains of the spring before it raises up to show its splendor, to fill the word with its sweet perfume and exquisite beauty.
Get out of your cocoon…there is a wonderful world awaiting for you.
I wish you a very happy and prosperous new year.
N. Cardoso 12/2013.
- Out of my cocoon (almostspring.com)
- Caterpillar-cocoon-butterfly (thewifescloset.wordpress.com)
- Working my way out of cocoon into becoming a Butterfly (thebeautyinbutterflies.wordpress.com)
- The freedom of a butterfly (freedombeauty.wordpress.com)
- Transformation – inside His cocoon (jillsquill.wordpress.com)
- Cocoon to Butterfly (roberthughey.wordpress.com)
- Karen Doonan: Cocoon to Butterfly (wolfke74.wordpress.com)
- Butterfly life cycle versus the growth process of a Christian (oodleuk.wordpress.com)
- New Beginnings (caughtinthelight.wordpress.com)